Understanding Parasocial Relationships in Streaming Culture

[00:00:00]the year is 2023. Anime is officially real you go on YouTube there's a bunny girl who snorts Red Bull you go on Twitch you get cat girls who love Jesus you go on Twitter anime girls are fighting over whether having huge fat 2D jugs as woke or not you open your favorite game even more anime girls going ooh and voice chat your afternoon snack cute it's an anime girl too there's no winning this war there's no turning back the clock you can't run from the Moe you can't hide from the Kawaii sugoi destiny but wait you can hear a whisper in the darkness the Calm before the storm the key to destroying this epidemic turns out those anime girls are problematic and they're hiding a dark secret a weapon they aim to enslave Humanity with it's called being parasocial now the most important thing to know about being parasocial is that it wasn't a real thing before YouTubers hit the market they invented it just like Sims weren't real before women started streaming and my right xqc has been Gold Club Wickes on viewers you can't be on the internet for very long without someone mentioning the term you breathe incorrectly and someone will accuse you of being it because in this economy daring to enjoy something is a sin that cannot go unpunished what you like some streamer girls content I bet you're one of those parasocial and these who was just She Was Your Girlfriend by the way when I start every day with PewDiePie's videos before heading to work that's completely different from whatever you're doing I'm not parasocial at all I've watched it since I was done it is called to just cheer me up okay yes indeed everyone is parasocial and I do mean everyone the only way to escape the label is to never turn on a computer or TV again and relocate to Antarctica cause let's not get it twisted by pure definition if you feel that you have a relationship with a media personality or even a fictional character you are participating in a parasocial relationship now hold on Lucy stop right there I don't feel like I have a relationship with them clearly I'm aware that I'm not their lover unfortunately so to call me parasocial well all I have to say is take your meds you do you really think it's that easy to escape the parasocial let me give you an example how many people slammed the last season of Game of Thrones rightfully so for being an absolute dumpster fire and how many videos were made about the fictional character Daenerys claiming that her actions were quote out of character and she would never do such a thing how would these people even know it was out of character if they didn't feel like they knew her on sub-subconscious level Gamers we have to be honest with ourselves if you've ever felt sadness upon seeing your favorite character die or you've ever been disappointed when your favorite content creator stops uploading then yes you're most likely somewhat parasocial but wait before you click off the video I'm not here to say that's a bad thing in fact I'm gonna play Devil's Advocate and say it can be a really really good thing sometimes and I want to take some heat off of the viewers as well because when it comes to being parasocial it starts with the source that's right streamers I'm coming for your ass and also my own ass I just think us is pretty neat I guess there anyone out there make fun of Brittany after all she's been through so being parasocial is usually attributed as the cause for some of the worst you've ever seen in your life the Vox Paradox the Russian Soviet Union the Suey say piss drinking that's right the silly say apple juice pets drinking if you listen to the internet tell a parasocial people or stalkers fans who are on the edge just one mistake away from going full and demanding you to rate their dick pics sorry that got a little bit too specific but the way I see it stalkers and bad people have existed long before the internet and will continue to do so and slapping the label parasocial on them sort of takes the bite out of it as if I'm somehow supposed to rank someone who's sending decapitated Barbie dolls to a streamer the same way I rank someone who redeems fart Reverb five times per stream because really to condemn all forms of parasocial relationships is to demand that people not feel anything but people somehow tune into a certain type of content every day and then leave with no parts of themselves changed now whether that part is your heart getting warm or your dick popping a jump that's a whole other story and I think that any artist or Creator would say that Detachment is not what they want out of Their audience they want you to feel something they want their work to mean more than idle entertainment if they can't get some type of emotional reaction out of you then they think they must be doing something wrong see no one thinks that an author is an for writing a story that makes them cry no one feels ashamed to admit that they cried while watching something like up either but when it comes to streamers and YouTubers there's this weird sense of Shame and stigma as if feeling attached to that person is morally wrong but I can't help but think that if you feel attached to someone that you watch every day you're just normal you're completely fine and to be honest the types of people that participate in her harassment and stalking would still do so no matter what the target does most of the things that people call parasocial just seem really sweet in my eyes maybe it's me maybe I'm the problem the psychopath so to speak but when I see fans branding together to make something nice for their favorite streamer the word parasocial never comes to my mind it just makes me smile I mean holy humans are just so of course I'm not saying that getting overly obsessed with something is a good thing that goes for anything in life media personality or otherwise and if you really want to point fingers at someone then do I have some news for you because this parasocial accusation is a psyopsis a cover-up for the true culprits at hand the people who lurk in the shadows who reap all the rewards and none of the blame streamers rise up gamer boys it's time to get your gaming girl bath water what if I told you that creators can be just as parasocial as Their audience if not more so I mean I'm not gonna Point any fingers because one I don't know what's going on in other people's heads and two I don't want to stirish but I think I've established that I don't think being parasocial is the Boogeyman everyone makes it out to be even so that doesn't give me the right to put anyone else Under Fire accidentally or not so you know what I'm gonna put myself on the stake for you nail myself to the golden arches like Jesus on the cross I and parasocial yes confirmed problematic streamer and the funny thing is I don't know how I'm expected not to be multiple days a week I come online to the same people I talk with them I laugh with them I entertain them and how they entertain me too I read their comments I see their encouragement and I feel less alone in my case it probably doesn't help that I'm pretty bad at making friends as is so having a chat that generally wants to talk to me is such a fresh nice feeling that I can't help but feel somewhat attached I know I can't be the only streamer reveals this way I also want to dispel the myth that streamers have no idea who you are sure if you work and never post a single message yeah that's probably the case but if you're a frequent chatter unless the community is bigger than a Billionaire's overseas bank account they probably recognize you and that's not even cope it's a fact of life if a streamer interacts with you enough times they start to remember your username the gist of how you type go figure I'm not saying they're your best friend or anything but that's not quite the same as having no idea you exist Does it like many other streamers I recognize usernames I have inside jokes with my community I find myself thinking things like oh so and so will say something if I do this or you know they'll probably react this way if I make another joke about my huge 600 pound cough and yeah I also notice when certain Chatters are missing when it's been a while since I saw a certain username pop up in the chat and that can genuinely make me feel a little paying of sadness even though it is one-sided even though the other person may have forgotten about me which means yes I am parasocial self-diagnosed but don't get it twisted that's not me saying I'm so special I'm different from other streamers look at me I actually think I'm the rule and not the exception because this is a really weird career and a lot of it is Uncharted Territory because while in actress girls and films are movie in spurts and doesn't interact with the viewers until later if she decides to at all streamer interactions are real time in the moment with the threat of getting one died always waiting around the corner I think it would be really difficult to emotionally distance yourself from something that's just so close and for me having this relationship with my chat has been done 99 positive experience sure weird happens now and then but if you deal with it quickly and set basic boundaries then I guarantee you viewers will understand so where does this leave us you just said you're parasocial and everyone on the internet tells me that being parasocial makes you the scum of the earth just tell me where to point the pitch for extra rimmer well what if I started somewhere in the I'll be honest with you gamer I struggled like a with this script the reason this is coming out late January and not early January is because I fought with myself so so hard over whether I should be making it or not in the first place I mean I'm far from the first person to talk about the term or to imply parasocial relationships aren't inherently bad I'm not even the first person to tackle it from a bee tubing perspective and yeah talking honestly about my thoughts on this topic has a chance of making me look like a toxic Apple which seems like a kind of play and so several times I'd start writing scrap it go back to it and then restart from the beginning all over again even here at the end I'm not sure I've made something coherent rather than just a ramble of my personal feelings as a streamer and maybe that's why I couldn't stop thinking about it because in all the very good videos that were made about the topic I noticed it was all from an outsider's perspective a scholar looking in on the degenerate and filthy little lives of streamer personalities and while it's one thing to hear a fellow viewer tell you that your attachment to a content Creator is a good thing it's another to hear those words from one in the flesh so I have two things left to say one to the viewers around the world whether you watch me or not whether you've been subscribed from the beginning or you're a Mr Beast viewer who's really confused about how you got here I'll say on behalf of all creators on every platform thank you I'm here to tell you about liking things is fine in fact I encourage it only you can look inside yourself and decide whether your admiration for someone or something is reached an unhealthy point and I for one trust you to have that maturity you don't need to associate yourself with people who keep a voodoo doll of amaranth by their desk just because people throw the label pair social around like it's a substitute for being down that abominably you're not a bad person for liking streamers and you're not even a bad person for wanting to suck fenster's toes I mean everyone wants to do that right but right and the second and final thing is I'm going to say something that needs a bit of a disclaimer I want to make this extremely clear I do not think the vast majority of content creators set out with the intention to form a pair of social blood with their viewers I think it's just the natural consequence of wanting to be liked wanting to do well and wanting our content to mean something to people without being said I'll be the first to admit whether we as creators are aware of it or not every single one of us ends up encouraging parasocial connections to some degree does it career suicide to come out and say that maybe but I'm just being honest I'm not gonna sit here and lie to you and say oh I don't care if you never watch my content again I hate it when people get attached to my work I hate it when people value me and make me a part of their routine because of course I don't I like it I get fulfillment out of it and just like any other human or demon human hybrid I'm happy that others enjoy well me and at the end of the day I don't think either the viewer or the streamer is evil streamers Inspire the viewers and viewers Inspire the streamer to do better to grow and to evolve viewers are the streamer's greatest motivation and if streamers can repay those people by making them smile laugh or making their work shift a little easier to get through what in the is the arm in that why are we so obsessed with shaming people over it the internet is great because it gives an option to people like me who shut down in face-to-face situations the opportunity to make friends the opportunity to be myself and speak freely not without fearing rejection because holy the stuff I see in some YouTube comments but while knowing that the people who do reject me are outweighed by people who support me with their whole hearts and souls like with most other things in life the truth lies somewhere in the middle somewhere between black and white parasocial relationships as with literally any other type of relationship have the chance to go sour in that sense it's just like any other relationship with proper boundaries and Communications things will be okay we will be okay and the next time I see a post about parasocial then the streamers fear I swear to God if it's another blanket statement on viewers for having feelings I'm anyway I'm embarrassed and terrified now and that's all I had to say about that so bye all right talk to you later